headache

galungan lan kuningan

2012-02-01T20:39:00.000+07:00

the four seasons

2012-01-24T09:59:00.000+07:00

"The Four Seasons" is a masterpiece composed by Antonio Vivaldi. Perhaps originally written for violin concertos, it scores four different sets of stories that represent all four seasons, beautifully arranged by the textures of tunes.

On Saturday, January 21st 2012, The Butterfly Symphony Orchestra played the score at Erasmus Huis. My favorite part was the "Autumn".

year end slap

2011-12-31T15:03:00.000+07:00

I attended this choir concert yesterday:

and at the mall's lobby where the concert took place, there was this World Press Photo exhibition which encourage the understanding of the world through quality photojournalism. Bitter and heartbreaking photos were shown, from a Middle-East girl with a big hole on her nose, super crowded prison somewhere in Africa, series of unfortunate events caught by the Google Street View, and even a beautifully composed seri of photographs showing "then and now" idea of some places. But nothing turned my head more than this photograph:

and the explanation that followed:

Andrew McConell
Ireland, Panos Pictures for Der Spiegel
1st Prize Art and Entertainment Singles
Joséphine Nsimba Mpongo, 37, practices the cello in the Kimbanguiste neighborhood of Kinshasa, Democratic Republic of Congo. She is a member of the Orchestre Symphonique Kimbanguiste (OSK), Central Africa’s only symphony orchestra. During the day, Joséphine sells eggs in Kinshasa’s main market, and rehearses with the orchestra most evenings during the week. The OSK was founded by its current conductor Armand Diangienda in 1994. Initially, just a few dozen musicians shared the small number of instruments they had at their disposal. Today, the OSK can muster 200 players for a concert. Most are self-taught amateurs who hold down day jobs all over the city.

[official post on the website]

My first reaction was *silent* then "bless that lady and all members of the orchestra, and may all their passions for music be kept alive". I'm telling you how lucky we are (I am) for being able to practice or rehearse properly in proper places, for being able to purchase decent musical instruments, for having all things provided when doing performances, for being able to learn any musical instruments you (and I) want anytime or anywhere, if only we have the will.

Keep in mind that every time we play a tune, we have the spirit of every musician in the world: good or bad, an expert or a beginner, old or young, rich or poor, with her own musical instrument or borrowed. No need to brag about your shiny instrument, spacious studio, or even your extraordinary ability in reading musical excerpt. Don't even whine if you're still borrowing guitar from your friend, rehearse full band in a small 3 x 3 studio, or simply if you can only play the I - III - V chords.

Happy new year.

may your days be merry and bright

2011-12-25T14:14:00.000+07:00

guitar pusjur session #2

2011-12-24T07:50:00.001+07:00

guitar pantry session #1

2011-11-28T23:04:00.001+07:00

in the making

2011-10-23T19:13:00.000+07:00

her first memory

2011-09-22T20:17:00.001+07:00

A loud noise appears as her tiny body tumbles inside a very tight, crowded space; the world is upside down. Screams, cries, all come out of sudden in a language she barely understands. Four, five, six people, all she knows is everybody shouts for help; she doesn't even feel any pain. Confusion is still tingling in her mind while solid-red liquid splats everywhere: to their clothes. to her clothes, to her face. Her perception on fear and pain will never be the same.
_____________

It was a car accident; the moment she learned that she's living.

the dragon warrior

2011-09-01T20:12:00.002+07:00

"Are you kiddin' me? We're warriors, right? Nerves of steel! Souls of platinum! Like you! So hard core you don't feel anything."

Pak Raden

2011-08-21T18:19:00.003+07:00

Trivia: Suyadi a.k.a. Pak Raden is actually an art school graduate who worked as an illustrator/painter. Just saying :)

after all these years

2011-08-17T10:08:00.003+07:00

Some thirteen years ago, we were classmates. We lived in the same neighborhood, and we took the same school bus. We hadn't really met each other ever since, leaving us clueless on what's the other friend is actually doing or struggling with.

Meeting again as adults brought back memories and stories untold. Not that I want to go back to those days, but as my dear friend Adis said, the more we grow up, the more responsibilities we should bear. A glimpse picture of childhood seems refreshing then.

P.S.: dear Viddy, I didn't upload your photos on facebook. I only post them here on my blog :p

P.P.S.: that Viddy guy has four little bunny pets cutely named Chibi, Kimi, Mili and Milo. Yes, we almost died laughing right away after a frown of amazement.

recovery

2011-08-08T20:40:00.005+07:00

always.

2011-07-27T22:37:00.003+07:00

Suddenly saw this video shared by a group on facebook.

P.S.: I miss high school.

a never ending loop

2011-07-23T18:53:00.002+07:00

"The road is like a never ending loop," this ten years old girl said. "When you think you were at the very front of all cars in this so called race, suddenly another car appeared in front of you. If you were the last car, suddenly another car chased behind you. Even if it was a dull, deserted street, you were never the leader. You'd always find the other car."

swimming pool all over again

2011-07-05T19:06:00.005+07:00

So this is holiday season. My little brother is taking a swimming course for days and I occasionally accompany him to the pool. The thing about this swimming pool sketches is I don't swim, so I have plenty of time to make drawings.

And the thing about a small sketchbook is I can't draw that much *desperately need a bigger sketchbook*

gunungan

2011-07-03T10:49:00.003+07:00

The Gunungan symbolizes the cosmos, the beginning and the end of everything. It is placed in the center of the Wayang Kulit screen before the drama begins, separating the opposed groups of characters and again at the end of the performance. It is also used during the play for scene changes and strong emotions involving fire, earth and water.

source: old.blades.free.fr/utilities/wayang.htm

2011-07-01T07:40:00.003+07:00

Elephants are a symbol of wisdom in Asian cultures and are famed for their memory and intelligence, where their intelligence level is thought to be equal to that of dolphins and primates. Aristotle once said the elephant was "the beast which passeth all others in wit and mind." The word "elephant" has its origins in the Greek ἐλέφας, meaning "ivory" or "elephant". (source)

my sketching tools

2011-06-25T10:27:00.000+07:00

I miss my old sketchbook

2011-06-19T23:01:00.002+07:00

... so I drew on some blank pages found. This one is on the 'pocket' page; the very last two pages that probably weren't intended to be filled with drawings. But, who cares?

2011-06-15T12:18:00.001+07:00

I freaking need to keep on task and not distracted with a million time-wasters waiting a button away.

table mat sketch

2011-05-23T18:13:00.002+07:00

Pendopo

2011-05-14T20:17:00.004+07:00

Bajaj Bajuri is a TV series that was aired in several private TV stations from 2002 to 2005. It portrayed a middle-low class family who lived in Jakarta in which the husband was a bajaj driver and the wife worked as a hairdresser.

Oh well, the Pendopo pictured here has barely nothing to do with Bajaj Bajuri anyway; unless you ask me who owns it :D

while waiting

2011-05-07T18:11:00.001+07:00

greenery and things in between

2011-05-01T19:09:00.007+07:00

They paved paradise and put up a parking lot
With a pink hotel, a boutique, and a swingin' hot spot
Don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you got 'til it's gone
They paved paradise and put up a parking lot

They took all the trees, and put em in a tree museum
And they charged the people a dollar and a half to see them
Don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you got 'til it's gone
They paved paradise, and put up a parking lot

Hey farmer, farmer, put away your DDT
I don't care about spots on my apples,
Leave me the birds and the bees
Don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you got 'til it's gone
They paved paradise and put up a parking lot

Listen, late last night, I heard the screen door slam
And a big yellow taxi took my girl away
Don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you got 'til it's gone
They paved paradise and put up a parking lot

-Big Yellow Taxi, originally by Joni Mitchell

at the zoo on easter day

2011-04-24T15:19:00.002+07:00

Happy easter :)

the last page of my sketchbook

2011-04-18T21:40:00.004+07:00

Having a sketchbook that accompanies me this last one year is almost like having an alter ego. Its pages express my feelings while I quietly draw in one corner of the world. Finally, it records the journeys I had, places I've been, and gives a sense of flash back along with the events in between times. It surprisingly helps me to be more patient.

So when it comes to the last page, I kinda feel... lost. At first I thought if someday I ran out of sketchbook, I could easily replace it with the new one. As a matter of fact, I can't.

And this is a scene I drew on the last page of my sketchbook.

the room i've always wanted

2011-03-19T06:46:00.004+07:00

White walls, black stone steps, white framed windows and sliding doors, a balcony, raised wooden floor, an empty studio which walls could be painted and repainted, working on things I like. Maybe someday.

'Contemporary Archeology Chapter Two',

Sigi Arts, Blok M, Kebayoran Baru, South Jakarta.

Better preview of the sketch.

My friend's shots of the exhibition.

This exhibition on the gallery's website.

tolerance

2011-03-10T14:46:00.007+07:00

Seeing the sad condition of this country lately when a relatively minor religious issues are potentially triggering bloody conflicts has sicken me. I am, as I've always stated, not a religious person. However as a human, seeing other people killed for choosing or even simply being something that is not the same as popular commons makes me really wonder, and finally relate to this elementary school thing which always repeated on and on every year as we can find in the Civics subject: Inter-religious tolerance.

I recently feel there is something wrong with the phrase. Something has lost in translation while fully understanding the meaning of the word 'tolerate'. It has the sense that something or someone is the normal and the truest of all things, and s/he lets the other who is outside her/his normal do things by her/his authority. At one point when s/he can not tolerate anymore, bad things will follow.

Here are the definitions of the word 'tolerate' I found in my computer's dictionary:

tolerate |ˈtäləˌrāt|

verb [ trans. ]

allow the existence, occurrence, or practice of (something that one does not necessarily like or agree with) without interference : a regime unwilling to tolerate dissent.

• accept or endure (someone or something unpleasant or disliked) with forbearance : how was it that she could tolerate such noise?

• be capable of continued subjection to (a drug, toxin, or environmental condition) without adverse reaction : lichens grow in conditions that no other plants tolerate.

Let me give you a case of tolerance. Someday in school, you had a math lesson. This teacher gave you a task to do ten complicated questions to be solved in 30 minutes. Apparently, the task is too hard for you that you couldn't finish it on time. So your teacher gave you ten minutes tolerance, wishing her/his students would finish the task. Your teacher didn't mean to respect you when s/he gave you time tolerance. It was simply because you couldn't meet her/his standard when doing the given work. In other words, you were not 'the normal' of your teacher. What if the teacher couldn't tolerate you? S/he will be very angry about this.

Other example is when you say 'I will not tolerate erratic behavior.' It indicates that there are some acts that other people do, but those acts do not meet your custom or idealism, and in some way you can not deal with them. 'Erratic' itself means 'not even or regular in pattern or movement'. The word doesn't even mean a bad thing. Only something not regular.

It is clear for me now why some people will not just let their friends -fellow human- live peacefully with their own virtue. I guess we are miseducated, being told that we are the truest, while other people with other preferences are just within our tolerance. So what is wrong with people with other religious believes than you? As long as they don't scar your being and way of life, they shall not be merely tolerated. They shall be RESPECTED for whatever their believes are. If you can not respect other people's choice, whereas her/his choice is legal and clearly stated in this country's constitution, then how will you respect other aspect of life?

night sketching

2011-02-20T16:45:00.002+07:00

Go here for a better preview.

superconsumersim

2011-02-08T19:50:00.002+07:00

Maybe Lunar New Year (along with Christmas, Eid ul-Fitr, Easter, and even Mother Day) has lost its true meaning. It is now just a theme for every mall's decoration and discount season.

Happy Lunar New Year anyway :)

what else would you want?

2011-01-26T19:53:00.008+07:00

A weekend, a peaceful small town, almost impossibly cheap yet delicious meals, bright weather, the sand and salty water, the blue sky, a great group of companion; a beach of our own. What else would you want?

P.S.: She's surely a great photographer. See her shots of this trip here.

P.P.S.: My picture with the dog is hers.

cliche

2011-01-14T10:00:00.005+07:00

cli·ché

–noun

1. a trite, stereotyped expression; a sentence or phrase,usually expressing a popular or common thought or idea, that has lost originality, ingenuity, and impact by long overuse.
2. (in art, literature, drama, etc.) a trite or hackneyed plot, character development, use of color, musical expression, etc.
3. anything that has become trite or commonplace through overuse.

[found this at the Faculty of Art and Design, Institut Teknologi Bandung]

someday we will meet again

2011-01-13T15:29:00.007+07:00

Dear friend,

I read your blog yesterday. Yes, the old posts you wrote. Very thoughtful and beautiful. They reminded me of those days of twenty-something talks. Premature but somehow brilliant thoughts about life, the culture, the surroundings.. Restless minds questioning every single thing on earth: the causes and consequences.

Funny to look back how we became a friend. We were the opposite of each other, we came from extremely different backgrounds, yet we shared so many similarities. We have relatively same generalizations on things. I will never regret all conversations and discussions we did, and I thank you for all knowledge and motivation. It is your writings that encourage me to keep writing. Also for the good times and (mostly) depressive times.

I saw you when you were disappointed and finally lost your faith. I know how it feels and none of us want to go back to that time. Now that you've found your decision of what you're going to do, go for it. Wash away the sadness, throw away your fear. I've learned that in some way it is okay to not knowing what you will be in life, as long as you like what you're doing now.

I imagine myself sketching lot of things, reading lot of books, writing lot of transcripts, and I have no idea what profession it is. I believe, in your very rich and colorful mind, you have a vision of what you'll be doing in life, without necessarily naming it. I believe, you will be good in your future field.

So long my friend, someday we will meet again with great stories from each of us. Wishing you wonderful adventures, like what you've always dreamed.

a coward

2011-01-10T23:00:00.008+07:00

New year, new year. I hope it's not too late to deliriously talk about resolution. Well. I'm not about to write down a list of aims or things I wish to be.

Anyway. Resolution is actually a promise to one's self that s/he will do or not do something, or a target -may it be a simple one or a more complex thing, merely for fun or truly as an urgency for its possible consequences- that someone needs to accomplish. By any means, resolution supposed to give hope and motivation to whoever wishing it. The thoughts and energy in pursuing resolutions should be positive. But, after a long way of efforts and when you finally reach your goal, what's next?

My last list of resolution was back in 2004, in high school. Back then, I wrote every single thing I wanted that I thought would make me happy. I did meet most of my wishes, but I never imagined any chain of details following them years later, nor the gruesome uncertainty of the life after it. It was revealed that being happy at one moment is not equal the ultimate happiness of my entire life, although once I thought it would be.

This is what I call a phase of life. It takes time for realization and it costs us frustration. Or else, it may be just (another) twenty-something hesitation without any knowledge on how to cure it.

Ever since, I stopped making resolutions related to my future life or career. I think I'm not ready to face another disappointment. Yes, I am a coward. For now, I only wish for two things this year: [1] a Yamaha Silent Guitar SLG-100s; and [2] to drink more beer. And I will need this damn cool wallet for the last thing I mentioned:

image source

life crisises

2011-01-05T16:46:00.005+07:00

If you are in your mid 20s, physically fit but you feel like you're emotionally unstable, mentally distracted, intellectually disrespected, financially insecure although you know you aren't that bad but anyway everything just seems wrong, then you are in your quarter life crisis. And if you think this situation is truly depressing, try mid life crisis.

His name is Pak Samiran, aged early 40s. He is in the army, but doesn't serve as a soldier -you know, the war and weapon things. Instead, he serves as a driver. Not a tank driver as you might imagine: he's just a driver; a driver of someone whose position is way much higher than him. Which means, he drives for his master's wife, children, and also friends of children -now that, includes me. And this was what happened:

Due to my best friend's wedding, I needed to take care of everything entrusted to me, but my friend insisted that I should not drive. So I ended up being a passenger of the committed driver, Pak Samiran. Two days were really enough for me to know general things that matters to him. On his age, he feels embarrassed about his job, which was why he tried his fortune to level up his position in the army, which he failed.

Not that being a driver is a bad thing, but we never really know what's inside someone's mind. He might not be aware that everybody else might be very thankful to have a driver like him. For him, he's just another looser. And he continued to sigh and told me his worries over his life, although he endlessly tried to accept whatever he got. Then he started to compare himself to other people who has succeed (mostly financially) in her/his relatively young age, and told me when he was at my age, he felt the most happiest since he was still single, free, weightless and reckless.

Despite his sadness and anxiety, he reminded me to not only look up, but also look down. You may feel so unfortunate but you have to realize, that hundreds or thousands people aren't luckier than you; they may even be poorer and pitier. So be thankful anyway.

I figured out, he's in a severe mid life crisis. And I foolishly thought being 20something is hard enough.

So, say hi to mid life crisis, I guess, some twenty years later.

January 1st, 2011

2011-01-02T22:17:00.005+07:00

Hello, Mbak Wanda.

I found it amazing how the days guide us to meet certain, specific people; and it becomes more amazing to know that they are the really right persons to help us keep our life going.

We were in the same high school, also the same university, and nobody will understand why we met and became friends only a couple years ago. I can not explain neither why the quality of our friendship feels like home, at least for me. It is like finding an old buddy with whom I grew up together, although we didn't; a friend who won't change and accept me whoever I am, however bad I am. The friend who made me believe that blessings do exist. All these somehow changed my perception on time and life.

And I still have no idea how I ended up working together with your 'real' old friends, the ones that you call 'your inner circle'; the really best friends of yours. I am honored that you trust me for the big things on your big day.

Happy wedding Mbak Wanda and Mas Suryo. Happy starting a new family on a new year. From now on, you are no longer a wandering 'flying kid'. You are grown up. You have soared into the air, sharing goodness to your surroundings, and I do hope they go back to you and your future family.

I have a good feeling about this year. Hopefully.

Have a wonderful life :)

P.S.: this is the scenic view from room 844 you've requested to tag.

welcome 2011

2011-01-02T21:22:00.003+07:00

*I supposed to post this yesterday, but the lame connection on new year's eve and a very busy day on January 1st delayed the greeting.

Happy New Year.

P.S.: it's one of the neighbor's firework.

a little talk to myself

2010-12-31T23:37:00.006+07:00

Last new year's eve, I thought that 2010 would be just another year. I had no idea 2010 would be a complicated one, and to be honest, I kinda feel overwhelmed. My careless mind sometimes think, what I've been through this year maybe more than another 23 years of my life, compiled into one. Too many bad news, ironies, life intrigues, mood changes, all went together with good news and hopes. I saw a lot, I learned a lot, but I realized that all these things may not be the biggest. Still, I haven't seen that much, and should learn more.

2010 goes really fast. I'd like to think, that these are another phase of life; a timeline which let me experience the world out there, accompanying me to grow older and wiser to finally live my own life maturely.

I'm going to see another firework show from the neighbor :)

merry christmas

2010-12-25T14:20:00.001+07:00

sketch another way

2010-12-06T07:16:00.002+07:00

a raincoat

2010-11-23T20:37:00.002+07:00

Someday, in a very heavy rainy season, you need a raincoat. You know someone who sells raincoats, telling you that she has any kind of clothes you need. You waited for days and suddenly she came out with a statement: "sorry, I don't have the raincoat. Would you like a jacket?" Tempted with the good design of the jacket, and a consideration that a jacket will also warm and protect you from the rain, you bought it. Guess what? It doesn't protect you from heavy rains.

You still need a raincoat.

20.10.2010

2010-10-20T23:19:00.000+07:00

surreal

2010-10-06T19:44:00.002+07:00

How does it feel to read this horrible news? And what if it happened to someone you know? What if you had to witness his dead body for the last time in its most terrible, unexpected shape just to make sure it was him?

How does it feel to be his friend? Family, parents and brothers?

I feel surreal. And dizzy.

visual note-taking

2010-09-09T15:20:00.003+07:00

rest in peace

2010-09-08T07:18:00.003+07:00

The funny thing about having so many relatives is that you won't recognize all of them. Once you gather, you'll be confused: who is who, which cousin is what, which in law is who, who is that? More over, once you met them again one day after years, you will fail to track the who-ness of who.

My cousin passed away last Friday and you will be surprised to know that she's 61. I'm 23. She was my cousin.

Rest in Peace, Mbak Nanik.

greeting cards

2010-09-01T22:04:00.003+07:00

So these are probably the cutest things I've ever done in my life. And that birthday card was not made for a 5 years old little kid. It was in fact for a friend whose age is almost twice mine.

untitled

2010-08-28T15:36:00.004+07:00

You know, sometimes we have no choice in living our days. Or, if there's any, then it may be a trap -at least it's what my cousin said; and I personally think she's true. So, with some other events that happened some previous episodes ago and some changes that distracted your faith you've been building the entire life, you may be cursing now. You're trapped in things you don't want to do, and you don't know how to sail your boat through this ocean of junks -which are things you once respected back then. You no longer believe in originals, for you've figured out that what they claimed as originals are actually not; you begin to do everything soulless. And while you're stiff-stated, suddenly you hear something you don't know how to react to. Should you be happy? But that would be very mean. And if you'd give your sympathy, it wasn't really from your heart. Oh.. the world.. It's always a soap opera, isn't it? Then you stop cursing. But you're not in peace anyway. Not yet. And this post isn't about architecture.

I am rambling now *dizzy head*

dirgahayu

2010-08-15T20:07:00.002+07:00

"Dirgahayu Indonesia,

bangsa serta alamnya."

-Indonesia Negaraku (A. Simanjuntak)

I grow up with them

2010-08-14T09:31:00.002+07:00

I've been living here in my neighborhood for nearly twenty years. I grew up walking the streets, watching my neighbors renovated their houses, seeing those kids who played in the field changing uniforms from year to year, and noticing the trees grew bigger. A friend said that those trees also surely noticed me grew, as I went to school everyday passing them, biking as a kid and sometimes driving as a grown up - which is true, I guess.

The Abduction of Shinta

2010-07-28T23:48:00.002+07:00

Rama and Shinta were a pair of lovebirds who voluntary exiled to the earth from their kingdom, Ayodya. They were also escorted by Rama's faithful brother, Leksmana. While on earth, comforting each other from the sorrow they felt, they saw a lovely golden deer playing around. Shinta was fond of the deer, asked Rama to catch it. They had no idea that the deer conspired with the bad Rahwana who had always been wanting to kidnap Shinta, taking her as his lover.

Then Rama left, granted his wife's wish to search the golden deer. Leksmana guarded Shinta while Rama was away. Suddenly Shinta heard Rama's voice, screaming for help. The worried Shinta unwisely asked Leksmana to find the voice, thus save Rama. Concerned about Shinta's safety, Leksmana made a circle shield around Shinta before he left, not allowing Shinta to get out from it.

While Leksmana was also away, Rahwana came to abduct Shinta. He failed twice, bounced by the shield. Knowing Shinta's good heart, Rahwana then disguised as a poor man begging for a sip of water. Soon as Shinta left the circle, she figured out it was Rahwana now taking her to his place. The hopeless Shinta dropped her jewels so that Rama would find her.

Learned that Shinta had gone, Rama wouldn't say a word to Leksmana. He thought his brother was being careless or worse, didn't fulfill his obligation to protect Shinta. However they managed to find Shinta's dropped jewels and promptly followed the trace.

Meanwhile, Jatayu, Rama and Leksmana's loyal bird friend saw Shinta who was in danger. Jatayu tried to save her, fought Rahwana with all his power. He failed. The severely wounded Jatayu was found by Rama and Leksmana, told them what was happening and pointed the way to find Shinta. Then Jatayu died.

The angry and heartbroken Rama met a group of monkeys led by Sugriwa, the prince of apes, who were willing to help him, if only Rama would kill Subali, Sugriwa's twin. Rama agreed. The monkeys fought against Rahwana, and Rama arrowed Subali to death.

And then Shinta was Saved.

the reconstruction of Candi Sewu

2010-07-28T00:08:00.001+07:00

travel sketches

2010-07-27T23:25:00.004+07:00

six years after

2010-07-21T21:39:00.003+07:00

I never really know how it feels to grow up. Maybe I'm not even the same person anymore.

Pics: four years old [left] and now ten years old [right] little brother. Grow good, dik :)

the international, finally

2010-07-19T22:40:00.003+07:00

It was April 25th, 2009, I fell asleep watching the movie.

While I finally fully watched it on DVD -thanks to Bude Ellisa- I still didn't really get it. Too many characters and the story is really political. Hence, I read the plot on wikipedia.org and figured out that the main idea of this movie is simpler than what I thought. And it's true that the movie contains so many architectural scenes.

"Well, this is the difference between truth and fiction. Fiction has to make sense." - Wilhelm Wexler

expired

2010-06-30T15:13:00.004+07:00

After all these long drives out of town (mention it. Solo, Tasik, Lembang, Bandung - now this one was secretly), breaking rules and speeding (fortunately) without getting caught, and after driving everyone else's cars (well, the rule-breakings were also with everyone else's cars), I just figured out that my driving license has actually... expired. since. last. october. And it nauseated me.

I'm really sorry, dear passengers. Which might include you. LMAO.

And don't worry because I've already had my renewed license just today hehe. I did a sketch actually, while queuing the process which felt like a thousand years. But my lame scanner is out of service, again. So. Will update later, I guess :)

update: above is my sketch on the location.

the author

2010-06-21T12:46:00.003+07:00

Truman Capote (1924 - 1984) was an American author which works included Breakfast at Tiffany's. He's a narcist. He's not humble, he fell in love with himself and his works. He partied with his friends and talked about himself a lot. He loved to be the center of attention. He drank.

He's a unique personality, though. He was openly gay; not the muscularly macho typed, but the one who spoke in high pitch with strange pronunciation of vocals and dressed unconventionally: he would wore a feminine scarf, something that would potentially be laughed at when the wearer was a man, at that time.

One day in 1959 he read the newspaper and found an article about a murder of the whealty Clutter family and declared that he himself would do the research on that event, then made the story his next nonfiction novel. Accompanied by his best friend, Harper Lee (the author of To Kill a Mockingbird), he went to find the Clutter's family friend who found them dead, did some interviews and got underestimated by local police but finally with his charm and money grabbed the access to meet the suspects and unlimitedly visit them in prison.

Then he began to stuck in a strong bonding with one of the inmates, Perry Smith.

They figured out that they had a similar background as a child, shared stories about the past. Truman regularly visited Perry and gave Perry his writings. But there was one thing Perry wouldn't tell Truman: the detail of the murder.

It was all about the book, and not their relationship. Perry who had taken Truman as a close friend, got disappointed when Truman stop visiting him and went to Morocco and Spain with his partner instead to write the first three parts of the book. The disappointment was more emotional than material, for he thought the friendship was unconditional and sincere. He felt betrayed by the author.

Eventually, Perry agreed to tell Truman the detail of the murder. How he was told that there was 10.000 dollars inside the house, how he considered that Mr. Clutter was a nice gentleman right before Perry cut his throat and killed the rest, how he felt ashamed of himself, and how he only got forty or fifty box from the house. He said it all with no villainous look of a murderer; a frustrated, ordinary human instead.

When finally the execution day arrived, Truman was nothing but heartbroken. Perry had sent letter to Truman to visit him for the last time, saying goodbye. Truman did come on the last minute, unable to hide his pain over loosing Perry.

Truman watched Perry's hanging.

The next day Truman was seen in an airplane, looking at photos and writings inside Perry's private diary, and some drawings that Perry made, including a drawing of Truman's face.

-----

After the movie, Capote (2005). Truman Capote's book about the murder, In Cold Blood was published 1965. It was his last book.

Some had speculated that the relationship between Truman and Perry was actually romantic. The picture shown above is from Capote when Truman and Perry were in the police station, taking a mug shot of Perry (image source).

The movie quoted Truman's words after the execution:

"More tears are shed over answered prayers than unanswered ones."

envy

2010-06-08T06:05:00.003+07:00

This is Alanis Morissette on a live concert in Barcelona, 2008. Image Source.

And I want that see-through guitar. Anyone?

may's weekends

2010-06-01T06:47:00.013+07:00

It's June already X_X

While the time goes really fast, I had interesting weekends last May, actually. Some were very personal (or emotional?) and aren't meant to be shared here, but at least two other weekends are just too exciting to be kept.

On the 2nd weekend of May, I had a trip to Cibodas, with the big family. Right. The. Family. Uncles, aunties, nephews, cousins.. I thought this trip would be very boring and pretentious, while I need to greet everyone 'happily' all the time. I figured out that it wasn't that bad. The place was a National Park, and it's really stunning seriously. The ancient trees and huge plants, fresh air, great view, it was really refreshing. The other best thing was I didn't really need to 'greet everyone happily all the time' because this rare opportunity being in such place gave me excuse to freely leave the guest house where we all stayed hehe. Here are some sketches:

The next weekend, I had a chance to sketch an event called TEDx. Well. I don't really know how to describe the event, but it's kind of lecture/sharing/discussion. If you know an event named pecha kucha, then TED might be similar to it. The global tag line for the event is 'ideas worth spreading', and it presented key speakers, performers and videos from TED events across the globe. Kindly click www.ted.com for the true information about TED. Why I was there? It's because one of my friend was on the event's committee, and she had the idea to record the event through sketches. As you may have guessed, the sketchers were me and Galih. Haha. And by the way I really like how they called us 'sketch artists'. Sounds cool, doesn't it? Go to my flickr photostream for better view of the sketches.

And this is one of some videos they repeatedly played during the preparation and break. which is one of my favorite song and singer of all time.

p.s.: I really miss writing :(

the atheist philosopher

2010-05-19T20:34:00.011+07:00

The amphitheater was full of scholars, the men of future, the seeds of leaders, derived from various cultural backgrounds. There beautifully stood Hypatia in front of all men, passionately shared what were known and unknown, the unsolved mysteries of the Earth. There sat Orestes among the proud scholars, admiring the stunning Astronomer, desiring her. Nobody had the idea that there, Davus, the Philosopher's slave, secretly soaked himself in all her teaching, secretly fell in love with his mistress.

Just outside the school, the Pagans and the Christians were mocking each other, ridiculing the opposites' gods. Both sides were arrogant, bragged their gods disgustingly. Both sides assumed that everyone who was not in their faith was wrong, then reserved the right to be punished; which was the reason why one day the Pagan felt the need to kill the Christians only to figure out that they're actually outnumbered, then hid in their great Library of Alexandria.

When the Roman authority finally declared that the Christians should be allowed to enter the Library, Hypatia knew that the sciences are in serious thread. The literatures, hypotheses, poems were about to be eradicated by the rage of angry Christians; not to mention the building, statues, the art.. Then she rushed to the rolls of scripts, saving the most importants as many as she could followed by her students and the slaves. While Davus the slave and his confused head helped nothing than wandering around to finally join the angry men, stated himself a Christian. A free man by then.

..........

Years went by and the world changed phase. The Pagan believers were then Christians, including Orestes who had become the Prefect of Alexandria. Then that the Pagans were outcasted, the conflict continued, with the Jews.

One day the Christians successfully attacked the Jews in a theater show on Sabbath day, only because it's Sabbath and they knew that the Jews wouldn't fight back. The Jews claimed the state of unfairness and disrespect on the attack while the arrogant Christians defensively argued that they should've been attending church on Sabbath instead of indulging themselves at the theater. Unable to win in the court, the Jews took revenge by spreading a fire hoax to trap the Christians in one room, then stoned them. The Christians' response to this was full of anger and hatred. Though their mouths said it's god's portion to punish the enemies, they cursed and screamed like mad dogs.

Davus, he grew up in a peaceful surrounding. His mistress didn't treat him as a slave but as a friend. 'Slave' was only an attribute given to him, only got him closer to Hypatia into her personal matters without being able to respond her casually: cleansing rituals, discussions, daily talks.. He never thought that the freedom he pursued was that cruel. He thought Christianity was about forgiveness and care, helping the poor and share as The Book said; not judgmental, narrow minded and even more, brutal. His head once again was full of conflicts as he began to question his so-called faith.

..........

While the world was under a political chaos and despite the new rule forbid her to teach, Hypatia's cravings for science stood still. Observing the stars, wondering the circle as a perfect shape, examining the orbits, and above all, wondering what they all mean.

She had no idea that the Bishop has a rough relationship with the Prefect, only because Orestes the Prefect didn't want to bow in front of their Holy Book after the Bishop stated that only men were considered honorable, no single woman had the right to speak her mind - moreover to teach, and no single woman had the right to show herself in public unless her body was fully cloth-covered, or she would be accused of witch craft. Orestes was still in love with Hypatia. The wise man of the religion deemed that Orestes' faith had been biased with his affection to the Philosopher, and the only way to save her was to have her christened, while the Christian monks outside had planned to kill her.

Davus heard the plan. He ran hard to her house, trying to warn Hypatia, just to figure out that she wasn't home.

Meanwhile at the Prefect's place, given the chance to rethink the rhetorical option, she stated thing that she'd been believing in.

"You don't question what you believe, or cannot. I must."

Soon, her life was at the verge of a catastrophe. Now fully aware of the risk she had taken, she walked home elegantly, refusing the offer of dedicated guards to escort her.

Davus was too late. The violent monks had found her, dragged her along the street to a church named Caesareum, ripped off her cloth, then prepared to execute her.

As the monks busy gathering stones to slay her, Davus secretly suffocated Hypatia so she wouldn't have to bear the pain of thrown stones. His heart was torn, memories flashed tearfully, regretfully.

Then died Hypatia, the uppermost, the supremest.

____________

from the movie Agora (2009), directed by Alejandro Amenabar.

a little time for myself

2010-05-10T20:36:00.002+07:00

inside | outside

2010-04-23T08:04:00.004+07:00

computer corner

2010-04-17T16:12:00.001+07:00

featuring my 10 years old bro :)

an interesting space

2010-04-05T19:09:00.004+07:00

I've been interested to - and ever since, wanting to draw - this photocopy service space near my house. I observe that this man has a very compact living + working space that includes everything he needs daily.

I went photocopy something this morning just so I can draw it :D

the life.

2010-03-20T14:25:00.003+07:00

Slightly last year on an anonymous, ordinary day, I wrote on my old blog a gibberish issue about a common attitude of any ordinary people. It is: the sense of self that everything is going to be okay. The sense of self that if there's any disaster, misfortune, or any other bad luck, it's not going to be me; it's anyone else's matter. The sense of self that if there's something that the world need; a change, an improvement, a sacrifice, then it's someone else's responsibility but me. I gave examples about war, accident, crime, earthquake, homosexuality, philosophical thought. And the list continues to add with atheism, bankruptcy, crisis and so forth.

I presume this kind of things happen as an idealized vision of a life, of a family. Just see the image of a happy, nice family on any commercial ad broadcasted on television. A couple, having two nice kids, living in a sleek modern house, buying a new car, touring the neighborhood. Well this image may appear in a society as everyone's hope for a good living. For most, a life is simply being born, growing up and go to school, achieving good scores in any subject, going to a prestigious college, easily getting a job with the so called proper salary, getting married, having kids, getting old, watching the kids grow up, having grandchildren, then die peacefully. I don't judge here, that if you have such vision, then you're wrong, at all. But unconsciously we miss a lot of details that involve both external and internal factors and after all, seriously, life is not that simple.

Going home early, avoiding bad guys, doing everything on the straight line, over-protecting your kids, then you think everything's going to be alright? I don't think so.

The world is rough and cruel. Closing your eyes to everything you don't want is not the way to solve any problems. Intrigues. Pretenders. Heartaches. Greed. Syndicates. Just when you think your day is hard enough, you'll figure out that something bigger and meaner might happen to you the next day. And just when you think you're mature enough to face everything in your life no matter how old you are, please rethink.

keroncong tenggara

2010-02-14T11:44:00.001+07:00

Last Friday me and two friends, Galih and Lalitia went seeing 'Keroncong Tenggara' performed at Salihara.

And I have to say nothing else. Very beautiful.

the sexiness of female wayang

2010-02-06T08:47:00.004+07:00

I've never paid attention to any detail of a wayang, until one day I need to work with a design that involved the figure of wayang. The first thing I did was searched the image of some female wayang[s] and re-sketched them using my personal judgments and interpretations. I was never aware of what they are wearing, which body parts resemble what, which lines are what, until I finished my sketches.

Guess what?
I found them sexy.

The issue that came across my mind was: why is it so skinny, why it has bright skin color, small eyes, sharp nose? I don't think the characteristics of these puppets match the common appearance of Javanese women. Was it the ideal shape? Was it the dream of any woman; even since hundred years ago? Was it because the raise of wayang was in the same time line when the Dutch colonized the country? Was it the picture of the beautiful mistress?

Anyway, if I keep talking about it then we may need to discuss it with some experts from the social-culture major. Let's just go back to the sexiness:

Forget Jessica Alba :p

to keep me sane

2010-01-30T06:17:00.002+07:00

wrong

2010-01-29T08:38:00.005+07:00

I drew this old chinese style ornament with a mindset that the pattern was the same on each side. So I confidently mirrored every line. After finishing the sketch, I looked back to the ornament and guess what: it is not a simple mirrored pattern; which makes my sketch inaccurate.

Isn't it what we always do in life? Simplifying seems the best way to digest the problem, finally solving it. But is it the way things work? What about doing something that is already wrong since the beginning? Can we really undo ourselves as the computer does?

a house without drawings

2010-01-18T16:40:00.003+07:00

"This house was made without drawings! I myself built this," he proudly said. He's no architect. He's no contractor. He's the stone man, a worker. You probably can not see the beauty of this house from my sketch for my style in drawing lines, but this house is really a good one; it's a big house but humble, earthy colors, green garden, big windows. Seems comfortable, and livable. The stone man himself made this house without drawings.

A very big failure for you, hey architects, if you're bluffing arrogantly with pride -because you may not be smarter than this stone man. He doesn't need to become a professor, nor the PhD. He knows how to create a livable house with his trained skills of building, and he just did. He doesn't talk as if he knew everything; the one that architects do.

1987

2010-01-09T00:09:00.001+07:00

the antisocial

2010-01-05T08:50:00.015+07:00

Yes. I was that excited. The vision to do sketch hunt at Kota Tua Jakarta seemed fun; I didn't predict the heat of the day.

Me and my friend, Novel planned to do a kind of hunting. Sketch hunt for me, photo hunt for her. We agreed to meet at the railway station's A&W -the all American restaurant :D. While waiting for her to come, I tried some sketches of the station.

It was very crowded, and I did the wrong proportion:

while the right proportion is this [I stretched my sketch haha]:

Soon after Novel arrived, we went to Museum Fatahillah's front yard. Unfortunately, it was the brightest time of the day, I guess. The glare of the sun dazzled our eyes. So..... I didn't sketch Museum Fatahillah. Instead, I did Museum Wayang and it's neighbors, under the tree.

And soon, we moved to the nearby Cafe Batavia. A luxurious one, actually. And we can't afford the meal :p

and I did a pointless drawing:

Then we went to Plaza Indonesia before it's too late hehe. I mean: before the work hour was over, avoiding the crowd of the commuters. To be honest, I didn't really know, what were we going to do at PI. Well, we did have an appointment with some friends, but I just don't understand the objective of this meeting. Also the composition of the attenders.. was just weird.

So we arrived at PI, find a place to eat and sit, then heard the other customers' very loud conversation.

Then we moved to Canteen. Which doesn't look like a canteen. I enjoyed the food, but didn't enjoy the meeting heeeee.... peace, everyone :D

the unfinished sketch

2010-01-03T13:28:00.007+07:00

I was accompanying my mother and her friends to PGI Cikini Hospital, to visit a family friend who got stroke last night. As usual, I stole sometime to sketch. The hospital's area is constructed by a group of interesting old buildings that I believe, had changed function in many times. Unfortunately, the visit wasn't long enough; letting the unwell friend to have proper rest time. So I was failed to finish my sketch. However, I tried to do some 'finishing' using black and white watercolour:

happy new year

2010-01-01T00:02:00.003+07:00

Thank you, dear neighbors and surroundings, for letting me see your beautiful fireworks on this new year's eve. And if you did go out to see the full moon.. damn. Should've been outside more often during new year, I guess. How I've missed a lot of fireworks these past years. Happy 2010.

a trip to solo

2009-12-31T23:42:00.030+07:00

24.12.09, 05:00 AM. Finally after all these years, I went to Solo, again. The last time I went there was... I forget. Maybe when I was on junior high. Or not. Maybe when I was a sixth grader, or fourth grader. I always envy someone who does mudik often. Well it's not really my hometown. It's my parents'. hehe. We went to Solo by car, and I took my turn to drive. Shift #1 hehe. You know, it's kinda weird when you've finally grown up, you have the ability and also responsibility as an adult, and you have to do the same thing as your parents do. In this case: driving. The last time I traveled far away with my parents by car, I was still a young kid. I didn't even know how driving is like. And I didn't take care of anything. The only thing I know was I traveled, being inside the car for a long time, then suddenly I got to the destination. I didn't have to worry about the speed, the trucks, other cars, other passengers. But now, well.. I think it's one way to realize that I'm an adult.

Our first stop was at Pringsewu, Cirebon, for a lunch. By the time we got there, I've been driving for 6.5 hours. Next driving turn was my father's.

Next stop was Semarang. Really, I was sooo sorry that we stopped at Pizza Hut. hmpf..... So it was a very heavy rain and traffic jam. And also flood. And we had no other choice other than that everywhere's restaurant. And you have to know: suddenly the electricity went off. At the restaurant. hahahaha. What a funny beginning. I forgot what time did we finally arrived at Solo, but the only thing I remember was, suddenly it's Christmas day already.

So, Merry Christmas. Happy Holiday. It's time too sleep. he.

After breakfast. We went to my uncle's house, met all those relatives I didn't even remember each. haha.

Lunch time, everyone was eating inside the house; eh, at least grabbing food inside the house before going back to the front yard hehe. So the it became a bit unoccupied. I missed the durian :(

This is what all the trip's about: my uncle's 85th birthday. Old enough, huh? And this is the front elevation of his house. hahaha. Does it have any relation?

26.12.09 Before lunch. Me and my cousin went to Villa Park Banjarsari. I really don't have any idea why the heck did they name the place that way. It just doesn't fit everything about the place. And it has a monument inside the park. A patriotic monument; which makes the name more unfit.

Actually I have another sketch of this monument, but I can't find the file. And I'm too lazy to re-scan the sketch hehe.

The neighborhood's gate.

Boring, sleepy day after lunch. I really didn't know what to do, I was stuck in uncle's home. Everyone said that they need to practice their singing; therefor they need me to play the guitar. But they didn't. And I couldn't go out in case they need me in sudden. How bored it was, that I sketch everything unimportant, then I fell asleep. Hoahm..

Then me and my cousin finally decided to go out, took a walk for a moment.

Unfinished sketch of Bank Indonesia Surakarta. Soon after I started sketching, the unfortunate rain came and my mother called: time to go back to Kepatihan Kulon. Hmpf.

View from the hotel room.

27.12.09 Me and my cousin began the sandal jepit journey walking the city. My first target for today: The famous Perusahaan Roti Orion, where everyone buys local snacks for gifts.

Next target: Pasar Gede a.k.a The Grand Market :D drawing this surely makes my skin goes darker hehe.

After the market here comes the Bank. Redrawing the [also] famous Bank Indonesia Surakarta which competition for its new building was launched few months ago, and the deadline for the competition will be on January 11th hehe. I know it from Pak Gun. So this building is located in one corner of an intersection. On the intersection there are traffic lights. I drew this building from another corner. You have to know. Drawing this is not easy, at all. I've told you that there are traffic lights. Means: cars stopped. And also buses. And it covers my view to the building, so I needed to wait for a few seconds every time the lamp went red. And it also mean, the car, motorcycle, bicycle, becak passangers and drivers stared at me curiously.

Really, I'm so proud of this sketch. I don't mean to brag, but just proving myself that I can do such detailed thing makes me happy :)

Then we continued our sendal jepit journey, only to find a thick wall surrounds a very large area. And we entered the area soon as we found a gate.

This is kinda funny, I guess, for we didn't know what area is that, what buildings are there. No sign, no name, no introduction to the place.. After entering the gate, and still with confusion, we felt the need to find a security a.k.a bapak satpam or someone in uniform or someone that looks in duty and go ask them. We figured out that it's the famous Istana Mangkunegaran haha. Now tell me, how silly it was?

A strange, old, broken building on the backyard of Mankunegaran. Probably it's the army's.

So this is a map that I drew based on.. my memory of the places. And instinct. hehe. I could't find any accurate map at that time, and it's not easy to get the map instantly in the city: the hotel doesn't have it, the museum's guide told us to ask the tourism board, the bookstores were closed - it's holiday. The only city map I saw was the one that hung at the museum's wall, as a decoration.

Another eating place.

28.12.09 The next day, we went seeing the city by car. It's still a sandal jepit journey for me hehe but this time we went to some further places that can't be reached walking. And also, we means me, my cousin, my brother and my parents.

The typical 'angkringan' that we'll find in most trading places in the city. This one sells soto, in front of Pasar Klewer.

The figure of Kyai Raja Mala. It was placed on the head of the ship to scare the enemies. Raja Mala itself is... well.. I don't really know hehe and I don't want to speculate. But as far as I know, the origin word, Mala, means evil. You know, as in 'malapetaka'. Now that makes the name means 'the King of Evil'. So far, this is my favorite sketch :p

Pakubuwono X's ride, displayed at Museum Karaton Surakarta. I was amazed to see its European style and decorations, including the figure of a very European angel there.

What if you went to a school, where its gate is this:

29.12.09 was time to go home. Another loooonggg waaayyy round. And this is our last stop: Rumah Makan Bu Nani, Pekalongan.

Well, not really. We stopped at a gas station after this, actually, where I took my turn to drive. Going fast between the trucks and trailers through the stormy night was great :D

an interesting night

2009-12-31T22:33:00.006+07:00

It's been a while since the last post. I had a full interesting week actually: I went to Solo, Central Java - which I'll tell in another blog post. But this one interesting day, happened last Tuesday. I was in an awful state, to many things inside my head and I just didn't want anyone to bother me. I think all of us might feel the same way sometime. So I smoke. Well I don't actively smoking. In fact, this is the first time for me since probably last year. And I decided to take my time alone at an old house transformed into cafe, doing some sketches for hours...

...when suddenly a girl from the other seat came straight in front of me, sat on the empty seat. And I was just "..." and then "okay." I really don't know what's inside the girl's mind. Well maybe she thought I was a guy haha and I figured out that she didn't. Anyway we talked and bla bla bla bla. I forget the conversation. hehe. I don't even remember her name. However, I was shocked. And it has become an interesting night.

sugeng natal

2009-12-22T09:06:00.001+07:00

brother's toys

2009-12-21T23:36:00.004+07:00

day-time

2009-12-21T23:28:00.003+07:00

we can always play with the day. and time. also place. we can also be trapped in it.

her TV corner

2009-12-17T12:22:00.001+07:00

this week

2009-12-09T08:08:00.011+07:00

My computer crashed. Haha. And it was last Thursday, so I can do nothing about the work-things since they're mostly done in computer. Lame modern lifestyle. Well I haven't fixed it yet because I think, it's actually great to live without it.

While I like being computer free, some things are just missing and I'm so confused about other things - like datelines. So I decided to make a refugee to Mbak Wanda's house, and borrow her computer.

And so I had a chance to scan things.

The day my computer crashed suppoesed to be a great day because me and some friends had a plan to ngehits. Galih's word. Blame him for this. Haha. Time chosen, place chosen, then the computer broke. I was stressed like hell and became the most autistic person during ngehits. Nice place actually, and since it was noon, we're like the owner of the place haha. Nobody's really there.

On weekend, I went to Bandung. For playing in a band. Hakahkahkaahak...

... and I always like this railway seen from Cipularang freeway.

We went to The Valley for dinner and the place was really great. Too bad didn't bring camera. And I didn't sketch. Too tired. So I did this yesteday by memorizing the place. Well, not really communicative, I guess :p

And so this is it: Calosa birthday at Radja Ketjil. It was kinda themed birthday dinner ya Cal? hehe.. the restaurant's theme is... well I don't really know. But it's decorated with the past time ornaments, mostly Indonesian-Chinese style. Really like Ayam Mandi Matahari. Happy 23rd, Cal!

the view

2009-12-03T07:09:00.001+07:00

December 1st, 2009. Margonda is a damned street. They cut down the trees to expand the road. Traffic jam. Unordered public transport. Cars. Motorcycle. Advertising boards. People. We almost forget that it has a very stunning view: Gunung Salak. And the view re-appeared today, might be after years.

random faces

2009-11-30T06:00:00.008+07:00

I always admire a person who can draw everyone's face.

I got the task to draw my own face at least twice: on elementary and first year of college; and both failed. However I'm very cuirous about this, and I have a will to give a try.

The above sketch, is actually my own face hehe. You be the judge. And the lower one, I tried to sketch different faces from photographs I found in a blog, which I forgot the name. While the lady now looks like someone I know, the man at the center looks like an actor named Stephen Rea, and the last man looks like someone in a mafia movie, all three pictures [unfortunately] don't represent the real person hehe.

the sky was clear

2009-11-29T17:22:00.003+07:00

quarter face

2009-11-28T10:41:00.006+07:00

A month after my 23rd. Drawing pencil set, check. Watercolour set, check. Drawing pen, check. And it has been my wish to have a steady pocket sketchbook to keep my scratches - so they won't spread everywhere in my room like the previous ones. So here I started my first page with this drawing. It's my quarter life. I've decided not to put the word 'crisis' after 'quarter life', just to keep my life cycling. This sketchbook will contain everything I want: inspiration, sigh, joy, depression, journey, etc. I have 190 more pages to bw filled. A kind of journal, but definetely not the cute one. The '11.09' means 'november 09', when I start this 'project'.

And I may not post everything here: only the selected ones :p

I hope this will do my life better.

Oh and by the way, it's my eye. I don't know if it looks like mine or not hehe.

empty stage

2009-11-23T17:45:00.005+07:00

empty stage from yesterday's recital at salihara. d

at the right place.

wallet

2009-11-23T17:41:00.003+07:00

thank you so much fiqi for this colorful wallet hehe.

self elevation

2009-11-19T21:03:00.002+07:00

architecture?

2009-11-18T07:39:00.006+07:00

It was Monday morning. The professor was giving a lecture about how building plans force the movements of the occupants [human], when suddenly he showed the plan of Phillip Johnson's Glass House. Actually it's quite familiar for me, I guess, and so for everyone who is learning architecture. It has been featured in many lectures and discussions, especially in the History of Architecture class.

But there's one thing I can not explain: why did I suddenly trapped back to the high school dream and conversations, and why now? Why not, let's say, few years ago when I was on my history class?

In case you think that I start to ramble, I'm going to construct a story about this.

Back in 2002 - 2004. I was a bold high school student. I liked to draw, I liked to play with pencils. I liked to imagine artworks. I played guitar. I didn't like to study, but I wasn't one of those rebelious-wannabe students who acted 'extra' in order to get more attention; I kept everything inside my mind. I was emotional, and I didn't like to joke. On my 3rd grade, I was the one who had an idea to decorate our class into an outer space experience for class decoration competition during the celebration week of Independence Day. Once a math teacher came into the class to teach. I can clearly remember he said: "When I went into this class, I felt like being in an outer space. Who's the architect of this decoration?"

It was very obvious, that my future carrier would be an artist, or designer [read: architect]. At least it's what my friends once thought about me. It was not because I make an announcement. I also didn't make any corny behavior to state anything; it's just that obvious.

And so it was. Everyone was talking about her/his dream college. Accountting. Medical school. Politics. Architecture was very rare. On the conversations with my friends, they often 'booked' me for their dream house. One friend wanted Javanese styled house. Another wanted a house with her own music studio. It was common, and nearly jokes. Not the kind of ridiculous, stupid jokes, but it's just a dream which we all knew, we're not going to get there soon. It's a kind of ideal aspiration to reach once we're adult and well established.

Then one of my friend asked: "how about your dream house?" I recklessly answered that it would be a small, square house, without room order, because it's only for me. And do you know that although it sounds selfish and careless, I really meant it.

I went to an architecture school, as I wished.

And I learned so many things, including this Glass House. But I remembered nothing about the dream house. I was too busy with my thoughts and depressions. I forgot to have fun. I forgot to dream. I forgot to play guitar. I forgot to sketch. I forgot to make artworks. Even I went out a lot, but I don't think it's the real way of really indulge myself in my excitement. I forgot how to be a human, a teenager with aspirations.

It's only last Monday, I saw the Glass House plan again. How shocked I was, that the idea was pretty similar to my honestly imagined house. And how I get more shocked to know that I never realize this.

left: Glass House. right: once it was my dream house.

You know, I never really hate architecture. I always love architecture as a humble space, and as a knowledge; but not as a profession.

It's the same way that I never really want to be an architect.

And this is the only thing I miss about being an architecture student:

random

2009-11-17T06:51:00.008+07:00

Just the random sketches on boring days.

"let them live"

Mormolyce Phyllodes

d
"full-full moon scared the hell out of me"

ruma maida

2009-11-06T21:38:00.006+07:00

Maida Lilian Manurung (Atiqah Hasiholan), a quirky, tomboyish and idealistic senior college student, turns an abandoned house into a school for street kids, teaching them everything from Indonesian history to how to play musical instruments.

One day, a group of leather-jacket-wearing thugs storm the house, forcing Maida and the kids to vacate the premises. A young architect, Sakera (Yama Carlos), hired by a real estate mogul, Dasaad Muchlisin (Frans Tumbuan), explains that the house has been bought and will be turned into a modern, commercial building.

Sakera thinks the house’s architecture should be preserved, but the idea is vehemently opposed by Muchlisin. Sakera gradually develops sympathy for Maida’s cause and romantic interest follows.

A sister and guardian angel to the street kids, Maida, who is also working on her senior history thesis on the fictional historical song “Pulau Tenggara” (“Southeast Island”), is desperate to prevent the house from being demolished.

Through flashbacks the movie also tells the story of Ishak Pahing (Nino Fernandez), the author of “Pulau Tenggara,” whose half-Dutch half-Indonesian status meant he was living in a perilous time.

Through the songwriter-turned-pilot’s character, the audience is taken into different chapters of Indonesian history, covering the 1928 Sumpah Pemuda (Youth Pledge), the Dutch colonial era and the Japanese occupation. While the connection between Maida’s and Ishak’s stories is not immediately obvious, it turns out the young idealist’s only chance to save the house lies in its history. - image source: http://www.rumamaida.com/ - movie review from http://thejakartaglobe.com/artsandentertainment/ruma-maida-a-potent-tangle/337944

November 5th, 2009. We unexpectedly watched 'Ruma Maida' together. We were me, Mbak Wanda and Galih. Why it was unexpected? Because we didn't plan anything. It came out of sudden; as when we planned something, it mostly didn't work. I go out pretty often with Mbak Wanda, but not with Galih.

Let me tell you about Galih. He is a friend of mine, of course. He was a Graduate Program student, who is now a Master in Architecture History and Theory. The very first time I knew him was in Ethno Architecture class couple years ago and until last year, I barely knew him. Last semester, we were the facilitators for the same subject. Since then, we discuss a lot, mainly about life. We're from very different background and education but surprisingly, we share some similarities in these quarter life crisis *haha*. If you see any of my previous posts that contained my complains *haha again* or thought about life, and Galih depressingly commented on those posts, then you might understand what I was saying. Vice versa. His blog which is now idle [hehe peace dulu ah, Gal] shares his interest in culture and everything else, including life. And I used to depressingly make comments on his posts.

So this was the first time I saw a movie with Galih. [Un]fortunately, the movie was 'Ruma Maida', which.......... kicked *nyengir ketimpuk*. Okay. Well basically, the movie is about nationalism and the youngs' idealism. In more detail, the movie contents architecture, history [of architecture], passion, and life discussions. In a very more detail, the movie contents stories about 'the last semester student from a notable university -alias UI which was our school- who is finishing her final undergraduate thesis', 'a young, idealist architect who is trapped within the wants of his client', 'discussions about idealism, professional ethics [this one especially goes to Mbak Wanda who currently is taking Professional Ethics class for her graduate study] and history of architecture', 'a little glimpse on religion' and also 'the past time pilot whose actual passion was being a musician and however he continued to become a songwriter' That's why it........... kicks *nyengir ketimpuk lagi*

This is a very actual prove, of what I've said before, that the universe is working in a very unique way in my life. Including sneaking up on me. And maybe you. I really don't understand why, did I see this movie with those two recent best pals. I think it was simply because The Greater Power Than Human needs to........ kick *sorry I can't find any other word* us in the middle of our so called life questioning. Or life learning. There were a lot of 'oh damn' from us when seeing this movie.

Really. You should see the movie yourself. However I don't know if it will kick you the way it did to me or not.

Ok back to the movie. I think it's a good one. At least it's out of today's mainstream which is sundel bolong or susuk pocong. But... despite its good intention in lifting up nationalism, I found some minor carelessness due to its setting details that unfortunatelly, have a distinct potential to be bloopers. So the setting was 1998. But we'll find 3 [a relatively new cellular provider] advertising board, Kijang Inova, and Pondok Indah - Bandung freeway direction board. Now that's careless.

christmas calling

2009-11-05T21:12:00.007+07:00

Christmas is near. Some are getting more religious in certain reasons - certain callings. Some are just pathetic. And for some, it is calling for... business.
d

Well, not my business, of course. This is actually my cousin's. I only did the design, as she asked me. Well, again, if you really want to use the term 'design', be sure that you solve something. Otherwise, it's not a desgin. He. The Design Methods subject has poissoned me o_O

So I don't consider myself a designer. I'm an... artist? Haha.

You know, when it comes to an event of a religion, people tends to put the aura of religiousness to it. Let's say, for christmas, we will have bible's verses, religious figures and pictures, symbols, and so on and so on for greetings and ornaments - including in t-shirt art. For me, bible verses in tees are just lame. So when I got the task to make t-shirt art themed christmas, I tried to find a lighter way in saying 'merry christmas'.

Merry early christmas, then :)

out of today's boredom

2009-11-02T19:03:00.004+07:00

The Galia Village from Asterix and Obelix inspired me.

and the wind blows my brain

2009-11-01T15:31:00.002+07:00

Thank you so much for the new drawing sets, pals :)

cheers. or not.

2009-10-30T00:58:00.006+07:00

I've been so curious about watercolour, but I never dare to try using it. My idle watercolour then became my little bro's experimental tools, causing the two major colors [red and black] to dry. Since then, I decided to try, however bad it is; and it started last week. And this is it [eh? sounds michael jackson. haha]

Hmm.. I don't know. I didn't mean to make a dark painting. It should've been brighter and happier. Hehe. I like the background, and dislike the glass. Big failure. Cheers. Or not.

P.S.: still wondering how to keep the original colours on the screen. Is it the scanner's fault or just the setting?

psychedelic

2009-10-25T21:28:00.005+07:00

I had a cloudy psychedelic dream last night

watercolour on paper, photoshoped images

pencils

2009-10-24T11:14:00.005+07:00

A friend who is a Greenpeace University course student has come back from her visit to Thailand [also for the Greenpeace thingy], and she gave me a set of gift you'll envy:

Tree-branches colored pencils. Hehe. Aren't they cool?

lights off

2009-10-23T08:00:00.005+07:00

starry night, watercolor on paper

I just realize that the outdoor night without lamps is just beautiful. Few days ago the electricity of the whole town was down. I went home when it's already dark, after taking care of a friend's house whose owner was abroad and taking another friend home. It was so damn dark that we were so damn creeped out.

Going back to home was so thrilling, since there was no light. Only the motorcycles' and the cars' also some lights from the generator operated lamps from a few houses and stores.

Then I got home, and stared above. It was amazing. The grey starry night had become the brightest light, leaving the houses and trees in a complete black silhouette, the dots of stars were contemplative; I suddenly imagined hundred years before when the little kid playing below the light of a full moon. It's said that the light of the moon was as bright as the sun's.

It was so breathtaking.

sandhy sondoro

2009-10-06T06:57:00.007+07:00

Take a look at this:

from http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pq2NT3fev4U&feature=related

Isn't he amazing? A friend texted me, recommended to see his performance at an "International Contest of Young Pop Singers - New Wave 2009".

Now take a look at his profile:

Sandhy Sondoro is an architect. He was born in Jacarta. He likes cycling and playing music in his free time. He has participated in many music contests. Sandhy is keen on football and he likes to play it. He enjoys spending his holidays on Bali island. If Ray Charles were alive, Sandhy would dream of singing with him.

and continues:

Drawing was Sandhy’s favourite school subject, but he could not stand Physics. The singer is good at cooking. He often treats his friends with delicious national dishes. He has taken to reading novels by the world famous writer P.Coelho recently. He says his symbol of luck in life and work is... his own heart. He enjoys listening to Bill Witlers, Led Zeppelin, Beatles and he likes soul music. His favourite composers are John Lennon and Paul MсСartney. [cited partially from http://newwavestars.com/eng/participants/17.htm]

The Schools of Architecure always proudly mention 'boxer turned architect' or 'mathematician turned architect' or 'physician turned architect'. How bout architect turned singer? A very big shock when I saw his profile. You sure know what I mean. Grkgrkgrkgrkgk...

you only live once

2009-10-03T13:23:00.008+07:00

Out of sudden, Mbak Wanda asked me: how did R. A. Kartini died at the age of 25?

I thought it's just another ordinary daily question until I realized, they're at the same age. Mbak Wanda and R. A. Kartini. When I asked her, "why is it?" she said, "I want to be like her, die at her age. I wished it when I was very young, 6 or 8."

"I do wait for it, in every single of my breath."

Since I was a little kid until high school, I also wished for the same thing: to die young. In my cloudy mind, I always believed that I'd die at the age of 26, which is three years from now. Sounds careless, right? She asked me if I'm still wishing it, and to be honest, I don't know; maybe I don't care anymore.

She told me things that she has planned; that she will someday write a letter of her last will, that she will give everything she has to her closests: her book case for her father, cellphone for mother, bed for brother, Mandy [her dog] for her boyfriend, diary for her best friend, and so on; and her blog for me. She told me how she whises it would be a memorial blog after her death. She talked as if she's really going to die in months. This might seems frightening, or ridiculous, like it's not going to happen. The *yea rite* thing which is a big joke for most twentysomethings. Yet nobody knows. When I came to a glimpse thought that it probably will come right, I was shivered.

I'm amazed, how she has come to the virtue of her life. That she knows every single precious thing of her breath, then she's able to say: "okay, I'm going to die young" and put the most honest, heartfelt smile after saying it. While my statement about dying young seems to come out of depression.

She's so inspiring. At the same time, I suddenly realized that the universe is working for me through everyone. Someone unique has opened my eyes so I see the world. Another intelligent one taught me to be strong by letting me do a big and massive thing. A funny person cheers me up these past days and together we did a crazy escape hehe. Finally, another splendid person saved my life more than once.

There are a lot of people near you; but not all of them are around you. While you're still alive today, live your life like there's no tomorrow. It's how we should value everything, because we only live once.

Kartini's parents arranged her marriage to Raden Adipati Joyodiningrat, the Regency Chief of Rembang, who already had three wives. She was married on the 12 November 1903. This was against Kartini's wishes, but she acquiesced to appease her ailing father. Her husband understood Kartini's aims and allowed her to establish a school for women in the east porch of the Rembang Regency Office complex. Kartini's only son was born on September 13, 1904. A few days later on September 17, 1904, Kartini died at the age of 25. She was buried in Bulu Village, Rembang.

d"25 tahun 5 bulan. Gw ingin meninggal pada usia Ibu Kartini meninggal :)"
- mbak wanda

affair

2009-09-27T20:47:00.005+07:00

I have an affair with this string instrument starting last week:

That's not mine and the actual color is green. That's why I photographed it in cyan mode :p and I don't think I'm going to buy myself one in the near time because it's e x p e n s i v e
d
A friend lent me and in fact I never played it when I was at home for its noise. This morning was my first performance ever -- in a mini orchestra group. The only reason why it seems easy for me to learn this is because the tunning is the same with guitar, so I have no big problem on fingering. So, yes I hope I won't stop here and continue learning every possible thing [read: instrument. hehe].